This past year has been one roller coaster ride! With twists and turns in so many different directions. My second child was born in July, although I was thrilled to be a mommy of “baby #2” I felt so concerned for my first baby. Did I give him enough time, will all my time go towards the new baby…these thoughts constantly ran through my mind.  Although my kids have a decent age difference of two and half years, I felt sad for my first born.  I felt as if he wasnt my baby anymore, I was even sad to leave him when I had to deliver my daughter.  It amazed me the amount of interest and excitement  he showed for her arrival however, I noticed some drastic changes in his behavior as time progressed.  He began hitting himself, throwing tantrums, whining and crying for every “no” I mentioned. At the moment not thinking it was anything serious it began to worsen. I felt like a failure, a bad mom, and any other awful characteristic you can imagine. Then I realized something, maybe he is not the problem…maybe it is ME! It has taken me a whole seven months to figure this out.  I needed to change my attitude and rearrange my emotions. One thing I noticed lately especially when we were on vacation; is that his behavior is different (better) when it’s just me and him. I thought, “there is no way I can take time away from an infant…she needs me more…he is more self sufficient because he’s older….blah, blah, blah.  He’s my baby too, and he needs my attention just as much. Here are a few tips and advice on what to do with to entertain and keep your toddler busy so they do not feel left out.

• Remember that they are going through so many changes emotionally and physically that they tend to act out and behave in a negative way. Try to help guide him.
• Mommy/son/or daughter dates.  I like to do this with my son at least twice a week.  Even if it is just me and him that go to the store together without daddy or siblings.  This helps to show him that he or she is still a priority in your schedule.

• Allow them to help you in any way. Kids are very interested and curious to help in any way they can.  This can include showing them to pick up their toys, help with the dishes, and even vacuum.  Reward them with positive reinforcements like, “your such a good boy and helper”. I noticed that when you let them help you they are distracted from throwing tantrums.

• Sometimes making a schedule helps to teach them consistency.  I know first hand that I have struggled with consistency, it is something that requires your attention and time.  Write out your ideas and put them on paper, and stick to it.  Having your kids do something at the same time everyday will also give them structure to prepare them for preschool and years to come.

Being a SAHM is rewarding however your kids require so much of your attention at all times of the day.  Try to include them in fun activities throughout the day so they are not left with time to throw fits.  I know that vacuuming and cleaning may take longer with the help of a toddler, but at the end of the day it helps build their self esteem and confidence and allows them to understand they are helping and doing a good job at it.  Kids need credit for good deeds just as much as adults do.  Every child behaves differently when a new member of the family arrives, this can happen over a period of time or immediately.  Just remember that kids feed off your energry and attitude, if you are angry and frustrated they feel it.  Take a bathroom break along with a deep breath to relax so your kids don’t feel your emotions.

Don’t forget to share your thoughts and ideas with me, I love to hear from you all. Signing out for now sending u all positive thoughts and prayers. Keep striving for mommy success 🙂