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I have always been a worker, I had a job since I was 17 years old. When I was laid off back in 2009, I was also seven months pregnant with my first child. At first I was fearful, “how are we going to survive financially, and take care of a baby?”. I was a complete mess. Once my son was born I spent most of my days, nursing him on demand and sleeping while he sleeps pretty much what every new mom does. Not until he turned three months did I realize I was in such a privileged position to be home with him and that being laid off from my job was a blessing in disguise.
There were days when I was tired, exhausted, sad, unhappy, happy, and any other emotion you can think of. I felt like being a stay at home mom was not for me. Once my son turned one, things began to change. He started walking, stopped nursing at around 14 months and was more independent. So what did I do? I started doing more outings with him, going to the park, zoo, out to lunch things of that sort. I loved spending time with him and I wanted him all for myself. One thing that I didn’t do was take better advantage of my time with him. When I say that I mean, I didn’t do mommy groups, clubs, or anything like that. I was totally closed minded when it came to stuff like that. I distanced myself from people and that harmed not only me as a new mother and woman, but it did harm to my son.
Now that I am a second time mom, I have learned more about time management and how to be a more effective mom while staying home. Some people think, oh staying at home is SO easy. I beg to differ. This is so hard. You really have to depend on yourself to do things. When you go to work, you have a schedule and a boss telling you what to do and when to do it. At home you are the boss. When your husband is at work, you are in charge of your home and children. Having two kids so close in age comes with its challenges. You really have to figure out what works best for you. Here are some of my personal tips that I use daily to help me keep my home structured without losing my mind at the same time. Kids need structure and balance, especially if they are not in school.
Do things at the same time every day. Make sure that your kids understand the difference between night and day. For example, they know it’s time to eat dinner because the sun is going down. This will help them understand time better and they will have a more effective day. Waking them up and putting them down for a nap at the same time will keep them on a schedule and help you to get things done as well. I try to put both kids down for a nap at the same time. So far this works. My daughter is so independent and likes to be on a schedule, so this helps my son.
Implement learning time and craft times.I try to do learning hour/reading time with my toddler, I also include my infant so she can become a part of the routine. Story time is usually before nap time and it helps calm them down before they go to sleep. I have learned that you must take advantage of every hour of the day. If you wake up late, or miss a meal it has an effect on everyone, especially the kids. Learning time can consist of a new number, color, or shape. Flash cards are great for this. Finally crafts. I like to do seasons or month crafts. So last month we did valentine’s day and winter crafts. This helps enhance your child’s creativity and teaches them to use their motor skills, to paste, or glue items.
Field trip day.Get out, enjoy the day! Remember that it is good to get the kids out and about every now and then. Take them to the local zoo or chuck e cheese. I usually do this on Fridays. I like to go early afternoon around 11 to be back for nap time. It is important to do these types of things with your kids but, try to remain on a schedule.
Daily walks or trips to the park. If your toddler is anything like mine, then they are busy and full of energy. I definitely recommend taking them for a walk or to the park to let out some of this energy they have. This will also give them an opportunity to interact with other kids.
Free play. I am a fan of free play. Let your kids play with their toys, color, paint and do things on their own. This allows them to use their imagination and to be self sufficient so they do not always depend on you to be their playmate. However, it’s ok to take a break and play with your kids. They love it and so will you! 🙂
These things have helped me to be scheduled and organized with my day and my kids. It is hard to stay home but remember why you are doing it. It is so easy to become distracted and lose focus of why we stay home…OUR KIDS! Whether you work, stay at home, or work from home always love what you do and do it with a passion.
Thanks for stopping by! Remember I love to hear from you all and look forward to your comments and feedback. Make sure to share with other mommies so together we can keep striving for mommy success!
Hey Renia I liked what you wrote and I proud of you your such a good person and great mother and I look up to u and have the up most respect for you keep doing good…
Thank You Samantha! I really appreciate your kind words. Pass along my blog to other mommies out there. I want to reach and help as many moms as possible through my experiences. Thanks for the support! 🙂
I totally agree with you! I did the same thing you did, I stayed home pretty much all the time for about 3-4 months, then I got into a routine and found a way to take care of my baby, handle my chores and go out and spend some time outside with other humans. 🙂 I am not part of any mom groups yet, but I do go to the zoo with friends and their babies while still trying to keep the routine so that my baby has an easier day and is not cranky. These are great tips and they totally work! We are fans of free play here too! That’s how my little one has learned so much in the past months!
Thank you so much for the support and feedback. Being at home isn’t so black and white as people think huh? It’s so hard to find the right schedule that works for you. Although I am not a strict scheduler, I do believe in them and they work! Kids get used to routine and it definitely helps them when they go to school. There are so many fun activities to do with your little ones, the list goes on. Once you have a schedule that you and your little ones can enjoy life at home becomes easier. I normally am not on a schedule on the weekends. I think that it is important for kids to have a break and be kids. I tidy up to make sure that the house is not a disaster at the end of the weekend. Thanks again for the feedback and keep on striving for mommy success! Remember to share my blog with other mommies out there! We have so much to share and learn from each other! 🙂
I really had a hard time when I decided to quit my job cause I really loved it, but all of a sudden the nanny had to leave, my mom couldnt take care of him anymore and the day care wad going to close and i was searching in lots of places to find one were i would feel comfortable and that’s when I realized: “why am I looking for someone to take care of him if its MY RESPONSIBILITY. I do believe that somehow god gives you signals of what you should do. Now i have 4 children and I cant say that I follow a tight schedule but now that most of them are in preschool I can get some time to spend with my baby alone. The truth is that housework never ends but it depends on us how we balance all.
Rosela, Thanks for joining in the conversation. As women we have such a difficult choice to make, raising our kids or going to work. I don’t know if you can have both, but I imagine how difficult it is. When you have more than one child, daycare or child care can be really expensive. I have found that it is more cost effective for me to stay home with my two babies. I agree with you that it is our responsibility to take care of our children. Finding a balance that works for you is so important while staying at home. It comes in handy to use every hour wisely, I have noticed for me in particular that breaks are necessary, and that you should definitely schedule one in during your busy day. Thanks for sharing with us, and hope to hear from you soon! Keep striving for mommy success! 🙂
I found this article right on time! It has been a few months since you posted it, so I am hoping you are able to see this comment and respond to it. I’ve been staying at home with my 9 month old, pretty much just letting her live her baby life as free as she pleases. My husband & I are making a transition (we’re in between two different cities) which makes it difficult to have her on a schedule but I’m about to attempt to implement one anyway. I do however want to take online classes so my question has always been what is she going to do while I’m doing homework ? She’s pretty attached to mommy, I’ve just introduced her to her playpen and she’ll play and watch the babyfirst channel for about 30-45 minutes without a fuss, and after that it is a scream fest !! I know I’ve said a lot lol, but just wondering what any mom’s have to suggest. My family is old school so they are perfectly fine with me leaving her in the play pen to cry it out… but, if I don’t have to go that route I’d like to avoid it.
I am so happy that this post was able to help you during your time of need. I know firsthand just how hard it is to juggle school and a new baby, because I did it! I will tell you that it isn’t easy and it’s going to take a lot of patience and a little sleepless nights on your part. I encourage you to continue with your education while being a SAHM it’s a great way to earn a degree while being with your little one. Here’s a few tips, things I did while I was in school.
1. Wake up early: You need to wake up before the first cry/feeding of the morning. Are you breastfeeding? If you aren’t that’s fine, you can do it with bottle feeding too. If they wake up and want to eat while your doing homework, feed them with one hand and read/study with the other. I breastfed my son from the computer all the time.
2. Download your assignments on your tablet or phone: this is very helpful too, you can be mobile while going for walks and such. It makes it more accessible to you.
3. Study during nap times: If you have your baby on a schedule during the day, you can work while they sleep. I know that it’s ideal to sleep while they sleep, but if your determined and really limited on time for your assignments then this is your best bet. In the end when you finish it will pay off.
4. Stay up an hour after their bedtime: I used to sleep around midnight! I know that’s totally crazy But I was so eager to finish and get things done.
I also agree with your old fashioned family, sometimes if all is well with your little one letting them cry it out is OK in my opinion (not for hours of course) but a little crying will do them some good.
I hope that some of these tips helped you out. You gave me a great idea to write a post for all my mamas in school. It’s a tough job raising a family and getting an education, but more power to you and keep it up! Keep me posted and don’t forget to sign up for emails and and monthly newsletters!
XOXO,
Reina